Saturday, November 22, 2014

Review: Full Throttle (Black Knights Inc. #7) by Julie Ann Walker

She Needs a Hero...

Abby Thompson didn’t sign up to be the daughter of the President of the United States. The position was forced on her by the small matter of her birth. Preferring a quiet life of study, she’s content to leave the politics and the international intrigue to her father. Unfortunately, the most powerful man on the planet is sure to make enemies. When a group of armed thugs takes her hostage half a world away, demanding the U.S. government release prisoners in exchange for her safe return, she fears her father’s policy of “not negotiating with terrorists” means she’ll never see the shores of the Potomac again. Luckily, there’s one glimmer of hope. His name is Carlos Soto. And though she abruptly ended things with him years ago, she knows now he’s the only man who can save her…
Black Knights, Inc. to the Rescue...

Carlos “Steady” Soto has taken part in his fair share of dangerous missions working at the covert government defense firm of Black Knights Inc. But nothing prepared him for the emotional rollercoaster he faces when he’s tasked with rescuing the only woman he ever loved—who also broke his heart. Racing against time and outmaneuvering a group of trained terrorists will take everything he’s got. Plus there’s the heat simmering between them which is threatening to ignite into an inferno. While ruthless enemies stalk them, they must learn to trust each other again. Even if they do make it out alive, will Abby turn her back on him… for the second time?

Oh, where to start. I blew through this book. And not for any good reason. I just had to finish it so that it would be done. That's a little general and with so many people loving this book, I do owe a big explanation. I mean, I'm definitely in the minority here. So maybe I'm just being super sensitive or picky because I just read something that was not my favorite ... I don't know. But here it is. 

Let me start off from when I found this book. I haven't read anything by this author and I was looking forward to finding a new Romantic Suspense series to get hooked on. The premise of Full Throttle was really interesting and I loved the idea of the daughter of the POTUS falling for one of her "protectors" and all of that. But then I started reading.

Man. From the very beginning, I just got this undercurrent of immaturity just flowing VERY freely. Most of the comments coming from the characters and their inner thoughts sounded juvenile and ridiculous. There were all of these weird terms for shit and I just don't have time to check out the Urban Dictionary every five seconds to look up this awkward phrase when I should be enjoying a novel. Now, before you start in on me, yes. I realize that this is a New Adult novel. I get that. I've read dozens of New Adult novels and none of them have felt quite as patronizing toward that age as this one has. Come on. No self respecting twenty-year-old is going to talk like this and it just felt forced and completely insincere. 

There were also tons of weird substitutions for saying crap or shit. It's just unnecessary. Well, it wouldn't be unnecessary if this was one of those books that didn't curse. I don't have a problem with books like that. More power to you, saint authors! But not cussing and thinking up weird shitty words and phrases is kind of negated when you are talking about a dude's junk in every other paragraph.

And that's another thing. I'm beginning to wonder if this was actually written by a horny 15 year-old. Now that's saying a lot!! I read tons of Historical Romance novels, now THOSE are filled with smut. Old smut, mind you, but smut none the less. And I love them. I love those trashy romance novels but the thing is, you know what they are when you pick them up. You know it's going to be a trashy romance novel and that isn't how it was with this one. I thought I was picking up a suspense novel and instead, I picked up a novel about a chick who when she gets into danger isn't thinking about survival, she's thinking about getting laid and the "rescuer" is thinking about his raging hard-on that he's had for years. Every two pages, there was a reference to this dude's penis. I'm okay with dick talk. It doesn't bother me but what does bother me is when it feels like that kind of thing is derailing the story. When you're reading a book, you can kind of feel where the novel is going to go next ... there's just this natural flow of things and man ... this book was like watching salmon try and get up that river only to be stopped by some dude swatting at them like baseballs with his junk. 

Anyway ... not a fan. I probably won't try another one from this author. I've learned my lesson.
Like I said, I am in the minority with these views and the book comes out soon, so you should at least check it out. But keep in mind that I fully reserve the right to say "I told you so" if the need arises.

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